where in the world...

i'm freaking obsessed with this song. it has become my anthem. ive made a fool of myself several times at the hostel where i "reside" in rome, because they have great satelite TV with music chanels and when this video comes on (once an hour at least, thank the lord!) i let out a squeal and come running from wherever it is i was nibbling my finger nails or preaching the brilliance of contemporary american literature and force the poor unsespecting bolivian/swedish/korean kid who innocently made the mistake of choosing the MTV hiphop chanel to turn it up full blast, so that i can spin around with my arms wide, rapping along with my boyfriend T.I. yes, thats right. T.I. and i are an item. best relationship ive ever had. bottle-popping, jet setting, fried chicken.

i miss america.

god, ok. so where have i been, right? lets start with the present. currently i am in my hostel in rome, a place i have come to love like a home in this trecherous city of mine. i found this place the day laura caramadre dropped me at the metro station. i had never stayed in the "vatican area" before, but the reviews of this place on hostels.com looked promising, so i booked, and i reckon the rest is history. i have left this hostel 5 different times, all with genuine farewells, sometimes with tears, sometimes with laughter, sometimes with dread. i have returned just as many times, and at this point its come to be something of a joke to the staff. i bid them adieu, and their response is, see you later this afternoon.
i arrived at 8 am this morning after a positively HORRIBLE overnight train ride in from venice. i was not aware until 5 hours into the ride that there was a train car with heat, so i spent the journey shivering and holding my knees to my chest trying to talk myself out of just freezing to death to end the suffering. finally made it in to the hostel, was greeting by dear richard who works the day shift, was shown to my room, and i commenced to sleep off the trauma of the previous night.

theres no way to recount these past 5 weeks in rome, too much has happened, too much has changed, too much has become of me. ive become a catholic, or im pretty close. i go to mass and pray and was given a prayer blessed by the pope which i keep on my person at all times. ive taken to drinking cappucinnos twice a day and smoking cigarettes. ive learned roman slang and romano curse words. ive made a friend who drives me through the city on his motorino, showing me the small, delicate side of rome, places ive never known, secret key holes and amazing views, views allowing rome to look small and manageable. what a farce. ive taught people how to make sushi and learned phillipino and dutch dishes from people i never knew existed. i ate mouth-numbing ethiopian food and ran through the streets holding hands with a friend aftwerward, swearing to each other our eternal bond. i walked through the rain with a boy from north carolina, a boy i knew was from north carolina before he even told me so, simply because he wore basketball shorts and walked in that way, that way southern boys walk when they attend UNC chapel hill and their parents own lake houses and they are perpetually in motion, loping strides and insatiable appetites. i spent too much money on a dress in an effort to make someone jealous and someone else happy and it worked damnit. i looked great. i have been given gifts and salutations from strangers, fruit and books and flowers and tiny trinkets, and with each gesture i become more gracious, more floored, more in love. i have been kissed at 3 am in front of the trevi fountain, the only two people there, me and him, moonlight and rushing water and i noticed for the first time that the fountain says "magnifico". ive known peace and ive lost my mind and i have been positively devouring books. and this is just rome. and this is just so far.

how was the farm, you ask? the actual work? the actual thing that i did and was suppose to do? oh my god, it was incredible. give me a minute to collect my thoughts...