Monday, August 17, 2009

happy anniversary!

it is the one year anniversary of my arrival in italy! a year ago today i arrived in rome, fresh faced, excited, having absolutely no idea what to expect yet being full to the gills with expectations. i reread my blog from that day, out loud, to angela. its beautiful. i wrote so well, i was feeling so much! little me, so sweet and young and full of life! and look at me now...still the same in all of those aspects, but i feel like i know so much more, like i have seen so many things and yet...as they say, the more i know, the more i know how little i know. what an incredible adventure this has been, and it just keeps going. i think back to everything that has happened in this past year, all the places ive gone and people ive met and little things ive learned and fought for and the tiny battles and losses and the amazing miracles and wins, and i dont know that a year of my life has ever gone by faster. i feel like those first days in rome are in my heart and on top of my mind, always. i can remember how i looked and what i was thinking and the way the air smelled. i remember the first friends i made and the first time i spoke italian to "an actual italian". i remember not having any clue what i was doing. i still dont. but thank god i did it. its so weird when you think back on things that you had expectations about. like when you imagine the way a certain city is for years, and then you go there, and you cant remember what it was you thought it was going to be like. i dont know what i thought all of this would be like for all of those years i longed for it. like this, i guess. i dont know that i could ask for anything more. i miss the me i was then; so much to look forward to, so afraid but so goddamned brave. i think i miss her, but then i realise that im exactly the same. i didnt know then what was going to happen, but it did. i dont know now what is going to happen now...but the lesson here: if you let it, it will. if you ask for it, put it out there, give it a good shot, screw up, be as terrified as you want in your head but never in your heart, the adventures will come to you in waves. so heres to me a year ago, a little me with bangs and such lovely clothes and nothing but vision over blindness and a job to do, and heres to me a year from today. i dont know who shell be, but considering the way things have been going, i imagine shes gonna kick ass, too. so cheers! and cheers to all of yall, dear readers, who have stuck with me and laughed with me and talked me through my confusions and sadnesses and celebrated my victories. cin cin, and a glass of Gewurztraminer to all!

allorah...so everything at the farm has mellowed out into a lovely, exciiting, exhausting-in-a-good-way experience. the WOOFERs all sat down the other night and made up a schedule, transforming the casino-like atmosphere of 7 people running amuck into a diligent, functioning machine. we listed all the different daily duties, time slots, and a little place to initial. a sign-up sheet. after that, it has been smooth sailing. the girls are wonderful. god, it feels so nice to have girl friends again! everyone is so smart and kind and funny, interesting backgrounds and talents. nicole, from san francisco, is a beautiful nicaraguan girl, whose mother was a dancer and whose father was a singer of political ballads during the nicaraguan revolution in the 1980s. shes fluent in spanish and italian, plays the guitar and sings, tells hilarious stories and makes homemade tortillas. rachel recites poems. well be in the pature, up on a hill, overlooking all of piemonte. the sun will be setting, the animals eating, the tranquil sounds of collective chewing lulling us all into a meditative state...and over comes rachel, without fail. "want to hear a poem?", she asks, and off she goes. she laughs easily, talks about anything and everything, spins about the room to songs in her head. the atmosphere is fun now, jovial and comfortable. i just sort of ignore the owners...
im collecting recipes, my loves, so many recipes! everything is made from scratch, the pasta and bread, the meat is always fresh from that morning, and the cheese...we harvest vegetables, hazelnuts, hunt for truffles. i talk to the animals like they are people and it cracks claudio, the italian boy, up. he loves coming to milk with me, we've got a rapport going. there are always guests coming and going, which makes each night sort of exciting. i swear, my only real complaint is the wine. its suppose to be perfect here, supposedly "the best" in italy, but piemontese vini sono merde! give me friuli whites or give me death! cannot believe how much i miss friuli, its hilarious.
speaking of...FL! was expecting him around 2pm, so when i heard, from a distance, the roar of his motorcycle around noon saturday, my stomach dropped out of my butt and i let out a screech and ran to the window, just in time to see him fly in, all mel gibson in Mad Max, but prettier. god, has he gotten prettier! his dimples are deeper and hes even more tanned and his arms are all muscley and his eyes more blue...bah! i felt both too nervous to look him in the eye and unable to not look him in the eye and like i couldnt sit still and stop fidgeting but like a big weight had been lifted off of me, just by the sight of him. we ate lunch and i introduced him around, and then claudio announced that i was officially on 24 hours leave and id better be off. we rode away, in manner of excape! was incredible! found our bed and breakfast, a beautiful little place with a winery outside of Barolo...tasted some wines, slept a bit, ate good food. was like not a day had gone by. sadly, however, my italian has gotten a little worse, due to the fact that there are suddenly so many english speakers to talk to. promised i would get back on my game. he brought me back the next day, to much surprise; apparently there had been a bet going as to whether i would come back or just ride off into the sunset, back to friuli.
so now i am here, and he has gone. two more weeks here, then a week with jane in calabria, some time with marion, and then back to cormons to wrap up some lose ends with school, write research papers, and attend the Friuli DOC festival. after that...not sure. we're searching for farms in sicily, so wish us luck!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

OMG I love you, Boo! And I LOVE having lived your life with you this past year. I was just thinking the other day about your "going away" dinner at your Mom's house last summer. How could it have been a year already, and then again, how could it have only been a year???? I am still so happy for you, and I just want this adventure that is your life to go on and on and on - as long as you continue to blog about it, that is!

Love, Aunt Keli

Amanda said...

It's like reading a novel that started out only a few pages, like a short story. But then, the further you read, the bigger the story got and the longer the novel gets and by reading it, you make it multiply and you never want it to end! Like if, while reading 'Gone With the Wind', Margaret Mitchell kept sending you pages, and chapters to add to the end so you never had to stop reading it! thank you for sharing your life with us!!

xxoo

Mom